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Yet another RE no no.

Dec. 10th, 2005 | 06:33 pm
posted by: redweth in fanfiction_hell

I know, I know. I look into something else next time, but I couldn't pass up this delightful fic. http://www.adultfanfiction.net/aff/story.php?no=544207638

I features LICKERS who apparently behave like overly horny wolves and thus feel the need to CAPTURE and TRAIN Leon S. Kennedy as a SEX SLAVE. Man, that's original.

Enjoy. But don't ask why. You are not at liberty to know.

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fanfiction_hell

As Macho Man Snapped into Jim Dugan's Slim Jim...

Nov. 5th, 2005 | 07:19 pm
posted by: programsurvivor in fanfiction_hell

It's been awhile since there's been a post so I thought why not hit up some delicious WWF action? And boy is it ever yummy!

First we've got this community's first necro fic! Silence features former WWF tag team champions "Bad Ass" Billy Gunn and "The Road Dogg" Jesse James. Billy has gotten angry at Jesse and punched him. And somehow this killed him I guess. And then Billy Gunn puts it inside the dead body. And for the icing on the cake, this is also a songfic. Oh yeah, fucking dead bodies is HAWT and ANGSTY!

The second fic takes itself much less seriously, which is fortunate because then this would be the saddest thing on the planet. Big Show and Joun Cena is short and graphic, but at least you know the author has got a good sense of humor. The best part about this is the reviews. People didn't seem to get the deliberate mispelling of John. But then fanfiction is pretty SERIOUS BUS so I think this guy got points taken away by the adultfanfiction.net illuminati.



Come on Macho Man, I want to see you smash some more fire hydrants.




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fanfiction_hell

(no subject)

Oct. 28th, 2005 | 02:58 pm
posted by: programsurvivor in fanfiction_hell

First, congrats to Grey for all his success in Disney Bonanza 2003. It is quite possibly the most creative piece of work on adultfanfiction.net. We do have a full account there so if anyone wants to post any of their sins against humanity let me know and I'll give you the password and screenname.

Second, we need to get some new members. We've only got five members and we can do better. Therefore I want everyone to try and get one member from their friends list who doesn't go to Ursinus. Or we at least don't see on a daily basis.

Third, Thirteen Ghosts fanfiction. Why is the blue hell is this needed? Honestly, I don't know what the fuck is going on in this fiction other than Royce Clayton from the movie and James Dean are having sex and it turns into snuff. I'm really trying to comprehend who the hell would even see the need for there to be butt sex with that shitty movie. And as I think about it, this story has NOTHING TO DO WITH THE MOVIE OTHER THAN THE ROYCE CHARACTER. And why the hell can't authors, you know, format their work so that it doesn't look like crap along with the crappy writing.

Don't forget, new members...

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fanfiction_hell

(no subject)

Oct. 28th, 2005 | 01:14 am
posted by: redweth in fanfiction_hell

It seems as if our mocking of fanfiction has left one aspect of slash grossly under-represented.

That aspect? M-preg.

The fandom? Harry Potter.

Guess who gets pregnant. Guess!

http://www.adultfanfiction.net/aff/story.php?no=544203025

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fanfiction_hell

(no subject)

Oct. 23rd, 2005 | 09:37 pm
posted by: redweth in fanfiction_hell

click for laughs: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2613407/1/

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Care Bears were invented for girls with low self-image to feel better.

Oct. 19th, 2005 | 07:04 pm
posted by: rememberfrankst in fanfiction_hell

Fan Fiction is sort of like AIDS. There's so many different strands, that finding a cure to the hellish disease is likely imposible.

I thought to myself, "there's no way that Care Bear fan fiction exists. The internet is ... too good for that."

Boy was I wrong. Hell, there's an entire website devoted to the wussiest cartoon that the 1980's had to offer.

The specific story I'll be linking to is titled "A Special Montel: Care Bear Style", written by the talented "Cool Squirrel". I picked the story, because the writer called it "PG-13" and I didn't want to suffer reading one of her dozen "G rated" shitfest adventures.

I'm not sure what makes it PG-13. I think a rabbit swims in gasoline or something. Notice the awful attempts at comedy and the endless Human Torch references. Fuck it, just read this sad attempt at humor:

http://www.takecarebearsplace.net/SpecialMontel.htm

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fanfiction_hell

*Taps Microphone*

Oct. 17th, 2005 | 01:16 pm
posted by: programsurvivor in fanfiction_hell

NO.

I have not read this fanfic. I don't think that I will be doing so. The reason is, Cowboy Bebop and Full Metal Alchemist cross overs SHOULD NOT BE. This is being posted purely on the assumption that it WILL be as bad as I think it is and that the mere concept is enough to make any Cowboy Bebop fan want to kill himself or herself.

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fanfiction_hell

Beating a Dead Horse

Oct. 14th, 2005 | 03:33 am
posted by: programsurvivor in fanfiction_hell

I was going to leave well enough alone, but god dammit this won't stand. Let's begin by saying that CROSS OVER STORIES GENERALLY DON'T WORK. This is because were two sets of characters from two series meant to "cross over" the original creators would come up with some sort of legitimate excuse for such a thing to happen. And even then more often than not, IT STILL SUCKS.

So imagine, if you will, an entire fanfiction.net profile devoted totally to cross overs. Yes, its frequent but the level of ridiculousness in the "pairings" if you will, is so out there that I just can't imagine what kind of warped person author Rock Raider is.

It's really too much for me to convey the utter stupidness of some of these things. I can't even pick out just one to single out for utmost badness. I'll give a few of the weirdest and leave the rest up to you to peruse.

Tales of Kingdom Hearts (Tales of Symphonia and Kingdom Hearts)
Elric, A Tale of Redwall (Full Metal Alchemist and Redwall)
The Land Before Time, Past to Present (Land Before Time and Mega Man)

And it goes on like that for the most part.

And we need some new members, so why not talk your friends into joining? There's plenty of crap out there for everyone I think. And one or two people are not enough to cover it all. Yeah, I'm begging for members. And I'm not so proud that I won't do it.


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fanfiction_hell

Hey, Smith! Remember me? It's me! ME!

Oct. 13th, 2005 | 02:16 pm
posted by: programsurvivor in fanfiction_hell

NO NO NO NO.

This is unforgivable. I can't say that I was expecting much from a fanfiction about Killer 7, but son of a bitch, this is a sin against humanity. This is I think the first entry we've done from fanfiction.net. So maybe a little context is in order. Fanfiction.net is where preteens and sweaty men obsessed with Saturday morning cartoons go to create cross over stories between Ninja Turtles and Sonic the Hedgehog. Really perverted stuff isn't allowed for the most part. The real horror emerges in the form of just plain bad ideas. Most of the examples from the site have either the most ridiculous premise in the world or they just make no sense grammatically.

Killer 7: Darkness Falls is a perfect example of the sort of garbage that goes up. I'm still having a hard time trying to understand what this really is. But I'll try to give what I can get out of it thus far. This is a Killer 7 / Starfox crossover. I shit you not. To make it even worse, he's crossing THAT over with someone else's original story about Starfox. So right off the bat you know that the author has no originality at all. He then proceeds to completely tear down every part of the Killer 7 personalities by making them generic anime badass heroes. Sorry to go fanboy here, but they're not. None of them are heroes, they're just doing their job because they enjoy killing and using their talents. And then Dan Smith flew an Arwing and I cried.

The story is not done yet, but I expect there story will continue and possibly Travis will hook up with that blue fox thing later. I can't fucking wait.

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fanfiction_hell

Scaley Badness.

Oct. 10th, 2005 | 10:37 pm
posted by: redweth in fanfiction_hell

This fic is disturbing and preposterous. I'm not going into detail, just read. Based on the remake of the original Resident Evil. Jill.
Snake in the Grass

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